


calling him the other man (when really it was me all along)

by rweoutofthewoods



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Cheating, Emotional Abuse, Keith & Lance (Voltron) are Neighbors, Keith/Lance endgame, M/M, Married Lance, Mentions of Lotor, Minor Hunk/Shay (Voltron), Original Character(s), Shiro/curtis/adam relationship, Toxic Relationships, adult paladins, domestic abuse, father lance, jewish Lance, lance is an accountant, modern day AU, they/them pronouns for Pidge, toxic lotor/allura
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-18
Updated: 2020-01-11
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:46:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 16,658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21853156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rweoutofthewoods/pseuds/rweoutofthewoods
Summary: Lance was living the American dream, a nice doctor for a husband, a good job, a big house, two kids, a Lexus parked in the driveway and family game nights every Sunday.Life was perfect…Well, almost.When the new neighbors move in Lance is suddenly thrust into a world straight out of a cringy romance movie, with awkward, unpredictable and interesting Keith from next door playing Lance's forbidden love interest.Lance's marriage was already falling apart, is he so wrong to turn to another man?_(Fic title from: Tired Of Me by Alice Kristiansen)
Relationships: Keith/Lance (Voltron)
Comments: 14
Kudos: 179





	1. do you hate the weekend cause nobody's calling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from: Put A Little Love On Me by Niall Horan.
> 
> TW: Abuse and Toxic relationships
> 
> [EDIT: okay so looking at this fic, in retrospect I want to say that I believe I fell into romanticizing cheating a bit, and the entire situation. I want to warn that this a work of fiction written by a younger version of myself and apologize if this is in any way hurtful to people who have been in similar situations.]

**part 1: do you hate the weekend cause nobody’s calling**

**(the beginning)**

Honestly, Lance still wasn’t really sure how he’d ended up in this situation.

He could tell you all the events that led up to it, well, sort of. Maybe he should just start from the beginning?

Yeah, that’d probably be easiest…

\--

Lance met Ethan in college, Lance was a business major, Ethan was in med school to be a doctor. They met through mutual friends at a party and hit it off immediately. Lance had just gotten out of a relationship; the whole thing was messy and had left Lance wrecked. His ex Nyma, had been his girlfriend since freshman year but Nyma had wound up not only cheating on Lance with the guy she swore was only her best friend, but then stealing Lance’s car after they broke up and leaving him stranded. She’d returned it only a day later with a tearful apology and Lance graciously decided not to get the police involved.

But after this Lance certainly wasn’t looking for a relationship, but then he met Ethan and he was just so easy, simple, normal. It was a nice change after Lance's last psychotic girlfriend and the general absurdity of his own life. Lance had never had anything normal, he grew up in a very large Jewish-Cuban family, homeschooled on a farm in Oklahoma, that on its own was a pretty unusual combination. Lance hadn’t realized just how weird it was until he moved the East Coast for college and was suddenly faced with all these people who were so normal, it took Lance a while to learn how to mold himself into somebody who was the same as everybody else. But he’d switched his major from his strange double major in Astronomy and Theater to a safe and normal major in business with a minor in Astronomy, he learned how to be accepted, and it made him happy. Lance’s family didn’t approve, his sister Veronica insisted that he was “losing himself in conforming” but Lance thought that was bullshit, he was safe, healthy, and happy. He didn’t feel like he’d lost himself, he felt perfectly fine.

But, back to Ethan, he asked Lance out after the first party where they met. They went on a dinner date the next weekend, then another after that, then another where Ethan asked Lance to be his boyfriend, Lance said yes.

Eventually, Lance graduated and got a nice behind the desk sort of job that paid well with lots of room to move up in the ranks, Lance stayed in Pennsylvania near where Ethan was completing med school, then Ethan graduated too became a doctor and they bought an apartment together, a year later Ethan proposed.

Lance said yes then too.

They tied the knot on February 22nd of that year, Lance’s mama cried, Veronica thankfully only offended a few people, and nobody got drunk and ruined the after-party.

Later that year Lance and Ethan bought a nice home in a suburban area with a two-car garage and a big wooden swing set in the large backyard.

Through a surrogate mother, they had two kids, twins named Elise and Jackson.

Lance was living the American dream, a nice doctor husband, a good job, a big house, two kids, a Lexus parked in the driveway and family game nights every Sunday.

Life was perfect…

Or at least Lance was able to convince himself of that up until one stupid spring morning set everything in motion.

Lance woke early as he did every Saturday to the sound of birds chirping and light filtering in through the blinds. He got the kids dressed in their nice clothes and wrestled them to Synagogue for their kid’s Shabbat service, all while Ethan slept soundly and didn’t help one bit, as usual.

After services, Lance chatted with the other parents and elderly members of the congregation over lunch.

It was around twelve when they left synagogue and headed home, the kids were excited to spend the rest of the day outside on the swing set because the cold winter weather had finally broken in favor of warm wind, blue skies, and blooming flowers.

After making sure that the kids changed out of their Shabbat clothes and into something they could wear to play Lance changed too headed out to the front yard to water the garden and turn on the sprinklers for the lawn.

Ethan was in the Kitchen as Lance was passing through to the front door, but Ethan didn’t even look up from his laptop which he was typing furiously on.

Lance cleared his throat alerting Ethan to his presence.

“What?” Ethan asked clearly annoyed.

“Nothing, it’s just that I’ve told you a million times about Shabbat, I get that you’re not Jewish and don’t observe it but if you’re going to be working please do it in your office where the kids won’t see. They don’t understand it yet, why you can work and be on your laptop and they can’t.”

Ethan sighed “Jack and Elise aren’t even inside right now.”

“But they could come back in any minute.”

“Well anything could happen at any time if you think about it enough, you could go into cardiac arrest right now, but you probably won’t and there’s no use wasting your time waiting for it to happen.”

Lance barely stopped himself from rolling his eyes, “Ethan please,”

Ethan snapped his laptop shut rather aggressively “Fine,” He huffed pushing past Lance and out of the kitchen.

Lance sighed to himself as Ethan retreated but continued on his original mission to water the garden and lawn pausing at the front door to slip on his sneakers before stepping out into the warm spring air.

He breathed out in relief as he turned on the hose and began his watering, technically, it was work and today was Shabbat, but as a Jew Lance was part of the conservative movement and his synagogue was egalitarian, tending to his garden wasn’t like work for Lance, it was relaxing and made him happy so Lance didn’t count it as working and allowed himself to take care of it on Shabbat.

It was as Lance was turning on the sprinklers for the lawn that a large U-Haul pulled up at the house across the street. 

He paused in his task to watch, a large man in a bright yellow shirt swung open the driver’s side door and stepped out of the truck, on the other side a small person (Lance couldn’t tell their gender from here and he didn’t want to assume) flung themselves out of the other side basically falling out of the truck, Lance winced as they hit the ground but they picked themself up easily like nothing had happened.

A moment later an SUV pulled up behind the U-Haul and a tall buff guy with a puff of white hair on top of his head and another dark-haired and darkly dressed guy got out.

The went over to the other people from the truck and spent a few seconds talking, Lance couldn’t make out what they were saying but the small person was bouncing on the balls of their feet excitedly.

The guy in the yellow shirt turned around seemingly taking in the neighborhood, Lance hurried to turn back to his garden before he was caught staring but he wasn’t fast enough, from across the street their eyes met. Instead of quickly turning away and pretending he hadn’t noticed Lance looking the guy in yellow waved.

“Hi!” He shouted across the street.

Lance paused confused for a moment before waving back timidly.

The guy beamed brightly before waving his hand beckoning Lance over.

Lance hesitated unsurely, the guy seemed too nice to be a serial killer, but maybe he was like Tom Bundy where he seemed nice but was actually psychotic. Lance shrugged to himself dropping the hose in the grass, at least if he was killed by a serial killer it’d be an exciting way to die.

As Lance crossed the street and approached the new people they guy in yellow smiled brightly.

“Hi!” He said, “I’m Hunk! My friends and I are going to be your new neighbors.”

“Uh hi, I’m Lance, it’s nice to meet you.”

“How long have you been living in the neighborhood Lance?”

“Seven years now,”

“That’s a long time, is it a nice place to live?”

“Pretty nice yeah, the last people who lived in this house were homophobic which was a lot of fun, I’m happy they moved. I hope y’all aren’t homophobic.” Lance figured it was best to get this part out of the way first.

“Nah,” The small person said butting in next to Hunk “we’re basically all some letter of LGBTQ+,” they bounced on their toes like a kid who’d had too much caffeine. “I’m Pidge, by the way.”

“Hi Pidge, that’s certainly a step up from the last neighbors,” Lance smiled “Are all of you guys moving in here?”

“Everyone except Shiro,” Hunk said motioning to the man with the white in his hair “he’s just helping us move in.”

Lance must have made a slightly confused face because Hunk then said, “We all work for the Galaxy Garrison, we’re going to be working on a project in town over the next four years, so they put us all in a house here.”

“You guys work for the Garrison, seriously? Y’all going to be working on Altea Base?”

“Yeah! I’m surprised you know it, most people don’t know much about the GG, it’s kept pretty quiet compared to NASA.”

“Oh well, I minored in Astronomy in college, and I was actually part of the cadet program at the Garrison from 8th grade to when I graduated high school.” 

“Wow, really? So were we! What do you do Lance?”

“Oh… I’m an accountant.” Lance admitted.

“You were a cadet and minored in astronomy but you’re an accountant?” The dark-haired guy said speaking for the first time. His voice was low and smooth, it sent shivers down Lance’s spine, but however pleasant his voice was, his words were condescending.

“Keith,” Shiro scolded “sorry about him, Keith has no tact or people skills.” The man who was apparently Keith scowled but said nothing,

“Oh, it’s fine. But yeah, I guess it seems surprising, but working for the Garrison just wasn’t the right path for me.”

“And being an accountant was?” Keith raised an eyebrow.

Shiro elbowed him in the side “Keith,” he hissed.

“I wanted a mundane life, my sister worked for the Garrison and it was anything but mundane. I just didn’t want it.”

“That’s fair,” Hunk said with a warm smile “I can’t believe that you were a cadet and that your sister also worked for the GG, it’s such a small world. What’s your sister’s name?”

“Veronica Mclain,”

“No way!” Pidge said excitedly “But Keith and Shiro’s sister is dating a Veronica Mclain, don’t tell me they’re the same, Veronica!”

“Is your sister Axca?” Lance asked his eyebrows shooting up.

“Yes, oh my god.” Shiro laughed “Our sisters are dating; the world just keeps getting smaller. She mentioned that her youngest brother lives in Pennsylvania I take it that’s you?”

“Yeah, I’m the baby of the family, I guess. Has she talked about me?” He made a face that a person only really makes regarding their siblings.

“A bit, mostly about your kids, she seems to adore them.”

“Ah, yeah Ronnie loves the twins. Well, she loves all her nieces and nephews, but me being the youngest my kids are also the youngest, so she spoils them rotten. All my other sibling’s kids think they’re too old to be doted on now.”

“How old are your kids?” Pidge bounced on the spot, “Are they cute?”

“They’re six, and I’d say they’re cute, but they are also my kids so I’m a little biased.” Lance shrugged.

“Wait are they twins?” Hunk asked.

“Yeah,”

“Oh my gosh, that’s so cool. Have they ever tried to trick people into thinking they have twin telepathy?” Pidge asked

“Not that I know of, but I get the feeling that you’d like to change that.”

“Yes! I know exactly how to do it!”

Lance laughed and opened his mouth to respond but before he could say anything his name was shouted from across the street.

“Lance!”

He turned to see Ethan standing at the front doorstep his arms crossed. “What?” Lance called back.

“What the hell are you doing? I’ve been looking for you for the past fifteen minutes.”

“I was in the garden, you should know that, I’m always in the garden on Saturdays.”

Well, it’s not really my job to keep your schedule, is it?”

“I never said it was,”

“Well I need you to get in here and clean up the kids, they got covered in mud, so you have to do laundry.”

“Can’t you do it? I was meeting the new neighbors, apparently, some of them are related to Veronica’s--”

Ethan cut Lance of mid-sentence “Don’t be an idiot Lance, I have work to do, you know at least one of us has to bring in good money if you’re never going to get that promotion. So, you could help out at a little and take care of the kids.”

Lance winced at that a pained expression crossing his face, but he quickly wiped it away turning to the new neighbors. “Uh sorry, I should go, my husband needs me.” He shifted in place uncomfortably, at seeing the surprised expressions on his new neighbor’s faces he quickly added: “Uh he’s not usually like that, I mean he has a lot of work to do and he’s stressed so…” Lance trailed off “He’s a little uptight right now, but he’ll go back to normal soon, he’s really nice and I’m sure he’ll love to meet you guys. But, uh I should go, if you guys need anything let me know and you should all come over to my place for dinner sometime so we can welcome you to the neighborhood.”

“That sounds great,” Hunk smiled warmly “It’s great to meet you Lance.”

“You guys too,” Lance returned the smile and quickly crossed the street.

\--

That evening after they’d unloaded all the boxes into the house and returned the U-Haul they were all sprawled out on their empty living room floor eating takeout.

“Okay,” Pidge said, “Was it just me or was the whole thing with Lance really setting off alarm bells for anyone else?”

“Huh?” Adam one of Shiro’s partners asked, he’d come later to help them move in.

“So, funny story,” Pidge said, “We met the neighbor across the street, and it turns out he’s Veronica Mclain’s youngest brother.”

“Are you fucking kidding me? That’s crazy.”

“I know right?” Shiro said, “It’s a small world.”

“Okay, but why was he setting off alarm bells for you?” Adam asked confused.

“No, it wasn’t Lance, he was really cool, I liked him. The thing that made me feel weird is that he was talking to us and then his husband came out and yelled at him and accused him of being useless basically and right in front of all of us talked about how Lance wasn’t getting a promotion, so he had to at least do something.” Pidge made a face “I mean I’d known Lance a total of like ten minutes at that point, but I wanted to tell that guy off, and then Lance said this whole thing about how his husband wasn’t normally like that and made a bunch of excuses for him, it just…”

“It reminded me a lot of Allura with Lotor,” Hunk said softly.

“You think Lance’s husband is abusive?” Adam asked surprised.

“I don’t know,” Hunk shrugged “It was only one moment, and we just met Lance today, but it definitely didn’t seem like a healthy relationship.”

“Well, let’s not jump to conclusions. Veronica has only ever said good things about Lance’s husband to me.” Shiro said “I mean, the only thing she’s ever said that could be classified as negative was that she though Lance was destined for bigger things than a desk job and getting married young. But for all we know Lance’s husband really was just stressed and in a bad mood.”

“Yeah,” Hunk agreed “You’re right, let’s just get to know the neighbors first before accusing anybody of being abusive.”

“Well Lance did say he wanted us to come over for dinner sometime,” Pidge pointed out.

\--

Lance invited them to dinner two weeks later, he was out getting the mail at the same time as Hunk was out getting his, there was a little boy clinging to Lance’s legs and Lance had the car keys in one hand and a Hello Kitty backpack in the other, a little girl who was presumedly Lance’s other child was standing in the driveway with her own Star Wars backpack which she was tossing up in the air.

He was clearly in a rush to get his kids to school, but Lance still stopped to wish Hunk a good morning and invite everyone to Sunday night dinner,

“I’m inviting two of my friends too, I think they’ll get along great with you guys.”

“That sounds great, we’ll be there.” Hunk smiled brightly.

“Cool, any food allergies?”

“Keith is lactose intolerant, but that’s it. And he just eats dairy any way half the time, without even taking his pill,” Hunk shook his head “He’s stupid like that.”

Lance laughed “Okay, I’ll make sure to have options for him.”

“Okay, that sounds great! We’ll see you Sunday then.”

In the driveway, Lance’s daughter suddenly burst into tears as she tossed up her backpack and it came back down hitting her on the head.

“Papa!” She cried out.

“Elise, honey,” Lance sighed peeling his son off his leg “are you okay?”

“No!” She screeched tearfully.

Lance muttered something under his breath in Spanish to himself and kneeled down in front of his daughter.

“Is there anything I can do to help?” Hunk asked Lance.

“Oh, no. She’ll be fine in a moment, but thanks, I’ll see you Sunday, is seven a good time?”

“That’s perfect, I’ll see you then. Have a good day.”

Lance smiled tiredly “you too,” He chuckled weakly “and I’ll try.”

\--

“Do I have to come?” Keith asked crossing his arms.

“Yes,” Pidge sighed “It’ll be fun.”

“Human interaction is never fun.”

“You know, normally I’d agree, but Lance is really cool, I think it’ll be fun.” Pidge shrugged.

“Plus,” Hunk cut in “Lance is accommodating for you and your lactose intolerance. And he said he’s having two friends over too, so it’ll be a good chance to meet new people.”

“I don’t want to go.”

Pidge hit Keith lightly over the head “C’mon Keith, stop being such a loser, do you not like Lance or something?”

“I don’t really like anyone,” Keith huffed.

“Stop being so emo,” Pidge rolled their eyes, “we all know that’s not true.”

“Fine I’ll come, but you can’t make me interact.”

\--

They arrived at Lance’s place at seven on the dot, they’d barely rung the bell when the door was swung open by a blonde woman dressed in pastel colors.

“Hi!” She said brightly “You guys must be Lance’s new neighbors, come on in, I’m Romelle!” 

“Hi Romelle,” Hunk greeted.

Pidge waved in greeting and Keith nodded slightly, Hunk figured that was probably the best they were gonna get out of Keith.

Romelle led them into the living room where Lance was with his kids who were involved in a very heated twister game, Lance sat crossed-legged on the floor spinning the wheel as the twins shrieked.

“Hey everyone!” Lance greeted, looking up as they entered.

“Hi Lance, thanks so much for inviting us,” Hunk beamed “we really appreciate the chance to get out, ever since we moved it’s been all about work and figuring out life in a new place, this break is great.”

“Of course,” Lance smiled “I want you guys to feel welcome in the neighborhood, and in a new place.”

The door opened suddenly, and a woman stepped into the house, she was the prettiest woman Hunk had ever seen. She had warm dark skin, soft dark green eyes, and a kind face framed by short hair and accented by gold makeup and jewelry.

“Hey Shay,” Lance waved as she entered.

The woman, Shay stepped in kissing Lance on the cheek and waving at the kids who had now given up on Twister and were just rolling around on the mat.

Shay hugged Romelle and then turned to them “Hi, you guys must be the new neighbors, I’m Shay, it’s wonderful to meet you.”

“Hi Shay,” Hunk smiled shaking her hand “I’m Hunk, these are my friends Pidge and Keith.”

“Pidge, Hunk? Those are such unique names.” She said like she was genuinely excited by this.

“Oh well, Pidge is a nickname,” Pidge admitted. “My older brother gave it to me and when he went away when I was younger and I started using it because I missed him, it just kind of stuck after that.”

“Aw that’s so sweet,” Shay smiled in a soft warm way

Hunk was pretty sure he was in love with this woman.

“I mean I guess, don’t tell anyone though, it’ll ruin my street cred.”

Shay winked “Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me.” She said to Pidge secretively.

Shay turned to Lance “No Ethan tonight?” She asked raising an eyebrow.

“Uh no,” Lance said his demeanor suddenly becoming stiff “He had extra work tonight so he’s at the hospital.”

Shay cocked her head, studying her friend, Lance shifted uncomfortably under her gaze “Okay,” Shay said eventually “well that’s a shame, he hasn’t been around much lately.”

“Well you know how it is, he’s got a busy job.”

“Yes, I suppose so,” Shay shrugged.

There was the beep of a timer from the other room and Lance jumped up “That’ll be the food,” he said quickly exiting the living room.

As soon as he left Shay’s nonchalant expression turned to a frown.

“That was weird,” Romelle said to Shay.

“Yeah…” Shay shook her head “But you know how Lance is with Ethan, he’s always been a little weird about their whole relationship. I mean he went from Nyma to Ethan it’s been an interesting situation from the start.”

“Er… I uh, don’t mean to pry or put my nose in somebody else’s business.” Hunk said quietly, drawing Romelle and Shay’s attention to him “But my friends and I were actually a little concerned about Lance and Ethan, the day we moved in Lance came over and we talked but then Ethan came out and yelled at Lance and said a bunch of stuff about how he was useless for not getting a promotion or something. It was right in front of all of us and normally I wouldn’t get into something that has nothing to do with me, but it really set off alarm bells.”

“Wait, Ethan said that?” Shay asked looking slightly shocked.

“Yeah,” Hunk nodded. “It could have been a one-time thing, people say mean things when they’re upset sometimes, I just figured I’d bring it up in case there was something worse going on and you guys obviously seem like good friends to Lance.”

“I’ve never heard Ethan talk like that to Lance before, but… I know he can be pretty mean sometimes if he’s stressed or having a rough time.”

“So, it’s probably nothing to worry about?”

“I mean, probably not. But it’s very kind of you to be concerned for Lance, I know you just met him, but I think you’ll be great friends. I’ll ask Lance about Ethan just in case there is something bigger going on.”

“Okay, I just wanted to be sure, I had a friend… she was trapped in a really toxic and abusive relationship for a long time and none of us had any clue. Since then I tend to be on guard for these things.”

Shay frowned “Wow, yeah I can imagine that you’d be concerned for Lance then, I’ll talk to him about it.”

“Talk to me about what?”

“What we’re having for dinner!” Pidge said jumping up “Because it smells really good.”

“Aw thanks! It’s my mama’s recipe…”

Lance continued on a long speech about the wonders of his mother’s cooking and Hunk breathed out a sigh of relief, he wasn’t sure how Lance would react if he found out that Hunk was prying into his private life.

\--

Keith wasn’t a people person, it was a well-known fact to anybody who’d spent a couple of moments with him. He had tried to be like Shiro who was always calm, kind and collected which resulted in everyone instantly admiring and respecting him. When that didn’t work Keith had tried to be like Hunk who was nice in the realest most genuine way, there wasn’t a single person who could make themselves dislike Hunk. Even Pidge who could be blunt and a little crude sometimes was so interesting and quirky that people liked them. But Keith couldn’t be like any of his friends or his brother, he couldn’t make people like him.

When Keith interacted with people, he was too blunt, too straight forward, too cold that it came across as ungenuine and often times rude. He didn’t mean to act mean, he just didn’t know how to be himself around people besides his closest inner circle.

So being at dinner with a bunch of people he didn’t really know and without Shiro’s diplomatic skills to perfectly smooth over any miscommunications, Keith tried his best to keep his mouth shut, of course, he couldn’t stop from being dragged into some conversations, Hunk and Pidge forced Keith into and as the night was nearing its end Keith was exhausted from trying not to accidentally insult anyone. As they finished dinner and Lance put his tired children to bed Keith quietly excused himself to step out onto the front porch. He needed a break.

Hunk grabbed Keith’s arm as he was leaving, “Thanks for making the effort and staying in here so long, I’m proud of you.”

Keith gave Hunk a half-smile before stepping outside but inside his chest was bubbling with warmth, making Hunk proud was a nice thing to do.

Outside breathing in the early spring air Keith pulled a cigarette out and lit it under the starry night sky. Keith thought the stars were better back in Texas, but he’d grown up there, so maybe he was a little biased.

“Hey,” A voice said behind Keith startling him.

He spun to see Lance in the doorway, the warm light from inside framing his silhouette, making him look angelic. Lance stepped onto the porch letting the door shut behind him as he approached Keith.

“Oh, uh hi.” Keith greeted awkwardly.

“Hunk said you were out here, I just wanted to make sure everything was alright, that you liked the food and stuff, you’re quiet and hard to read so I just wasn’t sure.”

“Oh,” Keith a little taken-aback “The food was really good, thanks for making the dairy-free stuff.”

“Of course, I wanted everyone to feel welcome, you and your lactose-intolerant-self included.”

Keith surprised himself by chuckling “Well thank you, I appreciate it.”

Lance nodded his eyes falling down to the cigarette in Keith’s hand “You know smoking can kill you,”

“I know,”

“Then why are you smoking?”

Keith shrugged “Can’t stop, yeah it’s bad for me, it’s also addictive.”

“Well you should try to quit.”

“Probably, yeah, but why does it matter to you?”

“Uh,” Lance raised an eyebrow “Because I don’t want you to die.”

“You don’t even know me.”

“Well, that’s true, but I don’t want anyone to die. Strangers, friends, family, I’ll encourage anyone to quit smoking if I can.”

“Oh, well that makes sense,” Keith admitted.

“Yeah, it does.”

Lance seemed a little stiff and after a moment of uncomfortable silence Keith blurted out: “I’m sorry if I offended you.”

“Huh? When would you have offended me?”

“I don’t know, at any point in the conversation? I- I’m not good at the whole polite social interaction thing, I tend to offend people, most of the time I don’t even know what it was I said. People don’t like me.”

“Oh,” Lance stepped closer casting Keith a reassuring smile “You didn’t offend me, Keith, you’re just a little surprising.” Lance shrugged “You don’t seem to say what I’d expect you to, but I don’t know I kind of like it. Maybe people have trouble talking with you sometimes because it can make people uncomfortable when they’re not used to something. But I think it makes you interesting, unpredictability is the spice of life.”

“I thought that was variety,” Keith raised an eyebrow.

Lance let out a loud laugh, something blossomed in Keith’s chest at the sound, it was bright and bubbly and sounded like something that Keith had been waiting for his whole life.

“See,” Lance shook his head still chuckling slightly “this is exactly what I mean, I wasn’t expecting you to say that at all. You’re fun Keith, I like you.”

“Oh,” Keith frowned “Not a lot of people like me, and the people to do have certainly never called me fun.”

“Well, I guess they’re just not seeing you the way I am.”

“Are- um are we friends?” Keith asked nervously.

“If you want to be?”

“Yeah, I’d like that.”

Lance smiled brightly “Then yes Keith, we’re friends.”

“You say my name a lot.” Keith noted.

Lance cocked his head “Hm, I guess I do. I like it, I’ve never actually met someone named Keith before.”

“It’s not as cool as Pidge or Hunk’s names.”

“It’s a different kind of cool,” Lance shrugged “Now, I’ve noticed that you have not said my name at all.”

“Oh,” Keith hadn’t realized that “that’s not on purpose… Lance.” He stuck on Lance’s name at the end awkwardly.

Lance laughed “There you go,”

“Lance…” Keith repeated more to himself.

“Trying to make up for not saying my name?”

“Maybe,” Keith shrugged.

“You’re so weird Keith, I’m honestly loving it.”

“Isn’t that the McDonald’s slogan?”

“Uh, no, it’s close though.”

“Well I’ve always thought it was stupid.”

“Good to know you have strong opinions about McDonald’s.”

“I do, It’s disgusting, eating there is how you get food poisoning,” 

“Hey, my kids love the happy meals there.”

“Your kids are going to get food poisoning.”

“I’ve never known anyone who got food poisoning from McDonald’s, Burger King though… that’s another story.”

“Burger King is a monstrosity.” Keith shuddered “How can anyone eat that and force such a thing on their body?”

“Says the guy smoking,” Lance pointed out gesturing at the cigarette between Keith’s fingers.

“Fair point,” Keith shrugged “I’m a hypocrite, but I still don’t like Burger King or McDonald’s I never had any around when I was growing up, so maybe I just don’t get it the same way as people who were raised around fast food.”

Lance raised his eyebrows “Where did you grow up that there was no fast food, outer space? Are you an alien?”

“I wish, but no, I grew up in a pretty much unpopulated part of Texas. It was mostly just desert.”

“Ah sounds interesting. I’m from Oklahoma.”

“You don’t seem like you’re from the south.”

“Yeah, I know. You do though, you have a little bit of that Texas accent in some things you say.”

Keith made a face at that “Yeah, when I went away to school, I tried my best to get rid of my accent but then after getting my degree I went right back to Texas to work for the Garrison, so it was kind of hopeless, but I sound less country than I used to.”

“Aw,” Lance laughed “I bet you’re hella cute with a full-on southern drawl.”

“I wouldn’t call it cute,” Keith said, “Just a bit embarrassing.” 

“Well, I’d have to hear it to find out.”

“Then I guess you’ll never know.”

“Aw c’mon Keith, don’t say that. I’ll hear it one day, I swear.”

“You’re swearing in vain then Lance.” Keith chuckled.

Before Lance could retort a car was pulling into the driveway, Ethan got out making his way up onto the porch.

“Hey,” Lance greeted.

“Hey,” Ethan replied eying Keith suspiciously.

“Oh, this is one of our new neighbors, Keith.” Lance introduced him.

“Nice to meet you Keith,” Ethan held out his hand and Keith shook it, Ethan’s handshake was a little past firm, he shook Keith’s hand just a little too tight in what seemed to be an unspoken threat. His expression however remained perfectly pleasant.

“It’s nice to meet you too,” Keith said quickly.

The front door opened and Hunk and Pidge stepped out accompanied by Shay

“Hey Lance,” Hunk said, “I think we’re going to head out.”

“Okay sounds good, it is a bit late,”

“Yeah, a bit. Thanks so much for dinner tonight, it was great.”

“Aw thank you! I’m glad you guys came.”

“Me too,” Pidge cut in “I work nights mostly, so it’s been forever since I had a real warm meal, normally I just eat whatever leftovers Hunk made. But this was delicious.”

“Are you saying my food isn’t delicious?” Hunk frowned.

Pidge rolled their eyes “Of course I’m not, don’t be a baby Hunk.”

“Pidge,” Hunk sighed.

Pidge raised their eyebrows challengingly “Yes?”

Hunk didn't respond, choosing to be the bigger person as always “Okay we’re getting out of your hair now,” Hunk said to Lance “And Shay, it was really nice to meet you, Romelle too.”

“It was nice to meet you too,” Shay smiled.

They waved their goodbyes and retreated back to their house Pidge sing-songing the whole way there “Hunk has a cru-ush!”

Hunk chose not to comment while Pidge taunted him.

It wasn’t until Keith was lying in bed that night that he realized something;

Maybe he had a crush too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, so I took a few liberties with Lance in this, one of them is yes, making him Jewish. I have read hundreds of Voltron and Klance fic yet I don't think I've ever seen any paladins represented as Jewish, I think everyone deserves to be able to see themselves in their favorite characters, I want my fics to be a place of inclusivity for people of all races, genders, religions, and sexualities. 
> 
> In this, I've made Lance a conservative Jew, for those of you who might not know, conservative in Judaism means something completely different than it does when we use "conservative" in most contexts. To break it down, there's a spectrum of how traditional you are in Judaism ranging from reform Jews (who basically choose to follow whatever traditions and rules that resonate them, sometimes reform Jews don't practice Judaism much, outside of synagogue) to orthodox Jews who are very traditional (married women cover their heads, the men may be seen wearing the kippot or hats like many people associate with Jewish people, they keep strict Kosher etc.). Conservative Jews tend to fall in the middle between reform and orthodox, they're more traditional than reform Jews but see women and men as equal and most conservative congregations also welcome inter-faith families too. 
> 
> There are also other forms on this spectrum of how people practice Judaism but if you're really interested I totally recommend you do some more research on it because many people don't know much about Judaism. This was a pretty blanket description of everything, but if you have any questions I'm happy to answer them in the comments.


	2. keep my cards to my chest and I never let no one know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title from: See The Way by The Chainsmokers ft. Sabrina Claudio

** Part 2: keep my cards to my chest and I never let no one know **

** (the accident)  **

****

It happened by accident really. 

Keith isn’t even kidding, it wasn’t a thought he’d dared to entertain. Having a romantic relationship was Lance was one-hundred-percent impossible. The guy was married for fucks sake, and as much as Keith had very much grown to despise Ethan, Keith knew that Lance must love him, they were married after all. 

Still, that didn’t stop Keith’s heart from doing a hopeful little swoop every time Lance would complain to Keith about Ethan. Lance hadn’t done that at first, but as time passed Lance went from casually mentioning something Ethan had done or said and then brushing it off as nothing to spending hours ranting about his relationship. Lance would come over at night after getting the twins to go to sleep and he’d collapse on Keith's bed and talk about everything that was bothering him. When he was done Keith would lie next to him and they’d look at the perfectly accurate constellations on Keith’s bedroom ceiling which were made out of cheap glow-in-the-dark stars. More often than not they’d spend the rest of their time arguing over whether the constellations were actually correctly placed.

But we should probably take a step back for a moment because where we left things off Keith and Lance had just met, just started talking, now it was a year, and they’d become unlikely but fast friends. 

Nobody had been expecting it, Keith didn’t make friends easily and Lance normally leaned towards people who were bright and bubbly, which Keith very much was not, but somehow, they clicked. 

It started off slowly, everyone went over to dinner a few more times, then they invited Lance, Shay, Romelle, and the kids over to their place for Hunk’s famous brisket and movies. After that it became a pretty regular thing, soon Shiro, Adam, and Curtis were joining them too and it was Hunk’s mission to convince Allura to come over for some time. Unfortunately, she didn’t rejoice in social settings the way she used to, but Hunk was sure that she would be best friends with Romelle. Ethan always seemed to be too busy to join them.

Every dinner seemed to end with Keith and Lance outside, whether that be the front porch, the backyard, or that one time they snuck away to the local playground and took turns going down the slide and pushing each other on the swings. 

That night was the most alive Lance had felt in a long time, he’d whispered that into Keith’s ear before he headed home. 

Keith didn’t miss the looks his friends shot him, no one could read Keith well enough to know how he felt about Lance, but they could tell something was weird about the situation. 

Keith brushed it off though and no one asked. 

But the accident that ruined everything… or maybe not ruined, but it changed things for sure. It changed everything for the rest of their lives.

Keith had been restless, it happened sometimes. Growing up mostly alone in the desert Keith could basically do anything and go anywhere he wanted. Stuck in a basic suburban neighborhood sometimes left Keith itching in his skin. When this happened, he’d take off for a little while. Sometimes he had a destination in mind, most times he didn’t. 

On this particular night, Keith wanted to go to the beach. It was January and freezing, but still, it was where Keith wanted to go.

He hopped out of bed, sent Lance a quick text, then bundled up and slipped out of the house careful not to wake Hunk before crossing the street to Lance’s house. 

The thing was, Keith had barely heard from Lance over the past few weeks. He didn’t come over and all of Keith’s texts were met with one-word replies or no reply at all. 

Keith only waited five minutes or so before Lance came out of the house wearing a jacket over his pajamas and clutching his phone in his hand.

“What the hell Keith? Do you know how late it is? Something better be wrong, someone better be dying for you to make me come out here.” Lance hissed.

“No one is dying, I’m going to the beach,” Keith responded calmly.

“Well good for you, you couldn’t have told me that over text or waited until tomorrow?” 

“I’m going now.” 

“You- what? Keith, you’ll get hypothermia and die!” Lance screeched just a bit too loudly for this time of night. 

“I’m not going to swim Lance, I’m just going.”

“Congrats? I’m still not sure why you’re telling me this.” 

“Because somebody has to come with me to make sure I don’t get hypothermia and die.” 

“I thought you weren’t going swimming.” 

“I’ve changed my mind.”

Lance pinched the bridge of his nose “You’re going to be the death of me.” 

“I’m going to be the death of myself.” Keith shrugged. 

“Probably,” Lance sighed “I have work in the morning.”

“So do I,”

“Yeah, but you don’t care, I do.” 

“We won’t be gone that long, you might be a little tired tomorrow but it’s nothing coffee can’t fix.” 

“Why are you going to the beach? Why am I going with you?”

“Because I want to go to the beach, and because I know you like the ocean. Also, I haven’t really seen or heard from you in weeks.” 

“I- I’ve been busy,” Lance said suddenly not meeting Keith’s eyes.

“Okay, but you’re not busy now.” 

“I was busy sleeping,” Lance said, but it was halfhearted, and Keith knew he’d already won. 

Keith didn’t say anything, just crossed his arms and cocked his head to the side. 

Lance stood his ground for a total of maybe thirty seconds before he deflated “Fine, fine! I’ll go, let me just change first—” 

Keith cut him of grabbing Lance’s am and pulling him across the street to Keith’s car “No need, it’s midnight on a Wednesday in February, no one’s going to be at the beach to see you in your pajamas.” 

Lance followed Keith getting in the car, though he protested the whole way.

\--

“I don’t think you know where we’re going.”

“Yes, I do,” Keith said taking a random turn.

“Really?” Lance asked skeptically.

“Yeah someone at work said the beach was this way,”

Lance nearly choked at that “What? You’re following vague directions from someone at work, I thought you’d at least looked it up on Google Maps!”

“Actually, they didn’t give me directions they were just talking about the beach and pointed this way.” 

“What the fuck? Keith!” Lance shrieked “We’re following vague hand gestures from someone at work?” 

“Yes,” Keith said calmly. 

“We’re going to die! We’re going to get lost or you’re going to drive us off a cliff!”

“There are no cliffs here.”

“How would you know, you didn’t even check Maps!” 

“Calm down, look there’s the ocean.”

That immediately shut Lance up. His mouth fell open as he took in the glittering water and sand painted silver by the moonlight.

“I’m not sure this is one of the parts of the beach we’re allowed to be on,” Lance said slightly mellowed by the ocean in front of them. 

“Who cares?” Keith turned off the car and stepped out slamming the door before Lance could say anything.

Lance slipped out of the car and hurried to catch up with Keith “I care!”

“No one’s around.”

“But—” 

Keith took Lance’s hand and pulled him down the beach before he could start ranting. 

“I dare you to put your feet in the water,” Keith taunted smiling the winter wind whipping his hair into his face. 

Now, Lance felt that it should be known that normally he wouldn’t even consider such a thing, but the fact that he was out here in the first place showed that Keith had a way of comprising Lance’s common sense, which is what led to Lance shrieking in the night air as the waves lapped at his bare feet. 

“Who’s going to get hypothermia now?” Keith asked breathlessly.

“Definitely you,” Lance tackled Keith and they fell in a heap into the shallow waves.

“Cold!” Keith shouted his voice shrill.

Lance just laughed.

\--

“We should probably get going,” Lance shivered. 

“Probably,” Keith turned to Lance but made no move to get up. 

“We don’t want to freeze to death,”

“We won’t, I mean we might not.”

“You know, ‘might not’ is not very reassuring.” 

“Okay, okay, let’s go then.” 

“You sure?”

“I am kind of cold,” Keith admitted.

Lance stood and held out his hand, Keith took it letting Lance pull him up. 

Their hands remained clasped as the hurried towards the car. They didn’t let go until they had to split up so Lance could go to the passenger seat and Keith to the driver’s side. 

They piled into the car giggling and shaking from the cold, Keith started the engine and cranked the heat all the way up.

“I swear to god,” Lance said his teeth chattering “if I get a cold from this, I’m never forgiving you.” 

“That’s a myth,” Keith said, “you can get hypothermia and frostbite from the cold, but you can’t catch a virus or an illness like a cold.” 

Lance rolled his eyes “Okay Mr. smarty-pants.”

“Pidge told me, they know everything.” Keith shrugged. 

Lance chuckled “I think you’re right about that, I’m pretty sure they’re gunning for world domination.” 

“I honestly wouldn’t be surprised.” 

Lance laughed and tilted his head meeting Keith’s eyes. 

There was a moment of silence punctuated only by the waves outside. 

“Um… look, Keith, thanks for tonight, it was nice to do something stupid and crazy. I haven’t done anything like this since I was a teenager.”

“Why not?”

“I- what?” Lance asked seeming a bit taken aback.

“Why haven’t you done something like this since you were a teenager? It’s clear that you enjoy it, that you like spontaneity and you want to have adventures. So why not?” 

“Well, I’m an adult, I have responsibilities. I can’t just take off now, I have a family and a job.” 

“I’m an adult too, I have a job and responsibilities, it’s never stopped me.” 

“Well, I’m not you!” 

Keith’s mouth opened slightly in surprise “Lance…” Keith said softly.

“No, look. I’m not like you, Keith, I don’t have a cool and interesting job that I love, I don’t have freedom or people who are okay with me taking off in the middle of the night. I don’t have adventures or do stupid reckless things I’m not…” Lance trailed of his voice cracking, he turned from Keith to watch the ocean out the window “I’m not happy,” Lance whispered like it was a secret he’d been holding in for a long time. “I have everything I’m supposed to have and want, but I’m not happy and I don’t know why.” 

“Hey,” Keith touched his shoulder gently “it’s okay if you’re not happy, that’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

“But I should be happy!”

“Says who?”

“Everyone.”

“Well, maybe what the world thinks happy looks like just isn’t what  _ your _ happy looks like.” 

“But I don’t want to be different!”

“There’s nothing wrong with being different.”

“Maybe not, but I’d rather be like other people.”

“Even people who are different have people who are like them,” 

“I- you’re impossible to argue with, aren’t you?” Lance asked sighing in defeat. 

“Yeah, Shiro had to go through a whole lot of shit raising me.” 

“I can imagine,”

Keith leaned towards Lance “Look, I’m not your run-of-the-mill guy. I can’t interact with people properly, I have a whole lot of shit in my past and a crazy job. But I still found people anyway, I found Pidge who likes the same conspiracy stuff as I do, I found Hunk who will not only listen to me but join in on my ranting about the design of our newest MFE model. I found Shiro who has been willing to put up with my bullshit for all these years and all my spontaneous trips in the middle of the night when I know I worried him by disappearing.” Keith shook his head “The point is, you don’t have to be like everyone else, the people who really love you won’t care. And the people who do care, don’t deserve you.” 

Lance sniffled and wiped quickly at his eyes trying to hide the fact that he was crying “But I’m afraid,” Lance whispered. 

“That’s okay, no one is expecting anything from you, and I’m not asking you to change your life but think about it, try to do more of what makes you happy, take more spontaneous trips, you deserve happiness.” 

“You make me happy,” Lance said straightening up.

“Really?”

“Yes,” 

“Okay,” 

A silence filled the car as Lance bit his lip brow furrowed, he was clearly thinking hard about something. Keith noticed that Lance was still shivering slightly.

“Oh,” Keith said, “the vent on that side is broken, you’re probably not getting any heat, it’ll move sometimes if you jiggle it enough.” He leaned over Lance to mess with the vent, after a moment he got it opened and went to move back but as he did Lance grabbed his wrist. It was then that Keith suddenly realized how close he was to Lance. He’s practically crawled into his lap to mess with the vent.

“Uh,” Keith blushed “Sorry.”

“For what?” Lance breathed.

“Getting in your space,” 

“I don’t mind.” 

And so, see? It was an accident, because one moment Keith was frozen over Lance and the next, they were kissing, Lance’s hands in Keith’s hair, Keith’s hand on Lance’s cheek, the other braced against his chest.

Keith didn’t even know who’d initiated the kiss, it could have been him, it could have been Lance, it could have been both of them at exactly the same moment. But somehow it happened. 

Keith was on fire, his breath was trapped in his chest burning through him, he had been set alight. 

Keith hadn’t even dared to entertain the idea of them, because it was hopeless and one-hundred-percent impossible. 

But now Keith was hopelessly tangled in Lance and the were pushing into the back seat of Keith’s car and Lance was taking off Keith’s jacket and then his shirt. 

It  _ was _ an accident. 

Well… at first.

But Keith didn’t stop Lance and so it went from an accident to a decision. 

Or maybe a mistake.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this fic is getting a lot weirder and more interesting than I originally outlined. I had three parts planned but clearly this story has a mind of its own. This was just too perfect that I felt like continuing this chapter/part would ruin the feeling. So now I'm splitting what was supposed to be one part into two.
> 
> Thanks for reading guys!


	3. oh simple thing where have you gone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: domestic abuse, verbal abuse, physical abuse
> 
> Guys this chapter is heavy, it's dealing with some hard topics. I'm warning you now.
> 
> Chapter title from: Somewhere Only We Know by Keane

**Part 3: oh simple thing where have you gone**

**(a tragic progression)**

Things progressed incredibly quickly, one moment Lance was kissing Keith in the back of his car, the next they were nine months deep into a secret relationship.

It’s not somewhere Lance had ever envisioned himself, but now, most nights saw him lying awake until the sun rose, watching the ceiling and wishing it was Keith’s with the constellations.

Something irked in the depths of Lance’s heart, he didn’t feel guilty, though eventually, he would—and when he did it would eat him up. But as of now, Lance felt too alive to feel guilt. It coursed through his veins, made every gray day spent in an office a little brighter, every night spent taking care of the kids while Ethan was busy with work a little less lonely.

For the first time in _years,_ Lance was happy.

Even his friends noticed, “You seem different,” Romelle mused one night over wine and a game of scrabble with her and Shay.

“What do you mean?”

“It’s like you’re… brighter,” She shrugged “happier.”

“Is it because of the neighbors? I’m really glad you’ve finally made new friends and found people to support you.” Shay said.

“I had friends before.” Lance frowned.

“You had us, now you have Hunk, Pidge, Keith, Shiro, Adam, and Curtis.” Shay pointed out.

“Well, yeah. I guess you’re right, I am happier because of them.”

But the thing about happiness,

It’s so easy to shatter.

\--

“I wish you could stay,” Keith whispered one evening as the sun was setting turning Keith’s bedroom shades of red and orange.

“I can’t,” Lance said carefully.

They never really talked about exactly what they were doing, though neither of them could ever really forget. It sat unspoken between them, turned see-through, easily ignored by every kiss, touch, and soft promise whispered in the dark.

“I know,”

“Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow,”

“Okay,”

“Ethan doesn’t have work, so remember, he’ll be coming with us to dinner. Please behave.”

“I always behave,”

Lance scoffed “Last time Ethan came to dinner you compared him to a goldfish.”

“That wasn’t meant to be an insult.”

“I know, baby.” Lance sighed “But please, try your best. Ethan already hates you, for absolutely no reason.”

“Well, he could hate me more.” Keith shrugged.

“Please don’t make that a goal.”

“I won’t,”

“Okay, you better not. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Lance leaned down pressing a soft kiss on Keith’s lips. Lance savored it, the sweet kiss, Keith’s warmth. It was what Lance dreamed about on cold nights with Ethan’s distance and a chill in the air.

“Bye,” Keith said.

Lance shot him one last smile before quietly leaving Keith’s room and slipping out the back door of his house.

It wasn’t like Lance really _needed_ to hide the fact that he’d been over and sneak around, he and Keith had been friends for almost a year before they got into the other stuff, but still, Lance felt that it was best if the amount of time everyone knew they spent together was limited. He felt it would draw suspicion if everyone was aware of just how much time they were with each other. 

So, he used the back door and met up with Keith in dark corners of restaurants and small little-known coffee shops and bookstores.

Lance was living a lie, but it wasn’t anything he wasn’t used to.

The difference was that this lie made him happy, so he was willing to live it.

\-- 

The twins were sleeping over at a friend’s house that weekend so Lance and Ethan arrived much earlier than they normally would when Lance had to wrangle his children into presentable outfits and get them to stop bickering.

Lance didn’t bother knocking as they crossed the street, he let them into the house dropping his shoes at the door (as Hunk always requested) before stepping into the living room where everyone was gathered.

Lance missed Ethan’s slightly perplexed expression at Lance’s familiarity. Ethan rarely ever joined them for their dinners and when he did it was always their own house.

“Hey, Lance!” Hunk greeted as they walked in.

“Hi, Hunk.” Lance smiled.

“Guess what?” Hunk said excitedly.

“What?”

“I’ve convinced Allura to come today!”

“Seriously?” Lance raised his eyebrows “I was beginning to think she didn’t really exist.”

“She does, I can’t wait for you guys to meet her, she’s amazing. You’ll love her.”

There was a slam of the door and Hunk jumped up “That could be her.”

It wasn’t, Keith came in breathless and red-cheeked.

“Where the hell have you been?” Pidge asked surveying him suspiciously.

“Um, y’know… out.”

“I don’t know,” Pidge crossed their arms.

“Well it doesn’t matter, I was nowhere.”

Keith quickly exited the room before Pidge could question him any further.

“He’s been acting weird lately.” Hunk noted.

Lance put all his effort into not nervously cracking his knuckles. It was an annoying habit he turned to whenever he got anxious, it was his very obvious tell.

“Guys,” Shiro rolled his eyes “Isn’t it obvious? Keith is definitely seeing someone, I’m certain that’s where he just came from.”

“What?” Pidge asked jumping up “But Keith is incompetent, he hates people and doesn’t date.”

“Just because he has never found someone who understands and accepts him.” Shiro shrugged.

“But if he is seeing someone, why hasn’t he told us?”

“Because he’s Keith, he’s a private guy.”

Pidge frowned “Well I’m going to ask him about it.”

“No Pidge,” Adam cut in sternly “He’ll tell us when he’s ready, please don’t interrogate Keith.”

“I bet he told Lance,” She said crossly.

Lance shook his head awkwardly at that and Pidge gasped “He totally told you! Why do you get to know and not us?”

“Because we’re best friends?”

“I’m also one of Keith’s best friends.”

“Yeah, but you can also be very judgmental sometimes, and scary.”

“Okay… that’s admittedly true.”

“What’s true?” Keith asked stepping into the living room, he looked a lot less disheveled than he had when he first came in.

“Pidge is an asshole.”

“Oh, yeah. We all know that.”

“Hey!” Pidge protested tossing one of the throw pillows off the couch and at Keith, he avoided it easily, not even blinking.

“Don’t be rude Pidge, we have guests,” Shiro said in his dad voice.

“You’re a guest!”

“Yes, and I don’t appreciate rudeness.”

There was the ring of the doorbell and suddenly everyone froze, even Pidge who’d been about to chuck another pillow, this time at Shiro.

“Oh my gosh, that must be Allura!” Hunk jumped up and hurried for the door.

“So, what exactly makes Allura so incredible?” Lance asked Keith who had come back into the room to stand beside Lance, though keeping his distance a bit more than he usually would, he seemed carefully aware of Ethan’s presence.

Keith chuckled forgetting Ethan for a moment leaning into Lance’s space slightly like it was the most natural thing in the world. In all honesty, maybe it was, they never could keep away from each other.

“I think the question is what isn’t incredible about her honestly. When I first met Allura I wasn’t too sure about her, she’s definitely the regal beauty queen type, it was a bit intimidating. But I’ve known her for a long time now and she’s one of the kindest people I’ve ever known, on top of that she’s so good with people and very understanding, also actually the strongest person ever. She’s been through some shit, but she only came out the other side even kinder and better.”

“Wow,” Lance smiled softly eyes only for his lover “she must be pretty amazing for the tough Keith Kogane to wax poetic about her.”

“Well, she is. You’ll see. You’re going to love her.”

“Okay, besties.” Pidge rolled their eyes at the two of them.

“What?” Keith asked crossing his arms and glaring at Pidge.

“Nothing, it’s just annoying how ‘best friend’ you guys are.” They made a mock retching sound.

“Just because you hate all your friends doesn’t mean everyone else does Pidge.” Lance scolded.

“Hey! I don’t hate _all_ my friends.”

“Really?”

“Yes, Hunk is too nice to hate and Shiro is too much of a dad. The rest of you suck though. Well, not Allura.”

“Thanks,” Keith said just as Hunk entered the room again followed by a tall woman with long silvery hair.

Lance’s first impression of Allura was that she was absolutely stunning. If he’d met this woman in college Lance was sure he would have got his heart broken by her, now that really wasn’t an option. But she radiated energy like a goddess or a princess, well more of a queen actually.

“Hello everyone,” She greeted in a crisp English accent her smile delicate but bright.

“Allura!” Pidge greeted running to hug their friend tightly.

“Pidge, it’s been so long since I’ve seen you. Have you gotten shorter?”

“Hey!” Pidge said immediately stepping back offended as laughter filled the room “why is everyone attacking me today?”

“I’m sorry,” Allura apologized “I couldn’t help myself, your height is perfect for you Pidge,”

Rather than continuing to act offended like Lance knew Pidge normally would they just shrugged and accepted Allura’s apology “It’s fine, I mean you’re an Amazon, everyone is short compared to you.”

“That’s true.”

The rest of Allura’s friends exchanged hugs and greetings with her before turning her towards the guests.

“Allura,” Hunk said “These are our new friends Shay and Romelle. Well, actually not that new, it’s almost been two years now, but still newer than like Keith and Pidge.”

“It’s great to meet you guys,” She smiled brightly.

“We’ve heard so much about you,” Shay said returning Allura’s smile with one just as bright.

“Yeah, we’ve been so excited to meet you.”

“Aw!” Allura giggled “I love you guys! You’re both so beautiful, Shay you have the prettiest skin I’ve ever seen, seriously you glow, and Romelle oh my gosh, I’d don’t think I’ve ever seen eyes as bright as yours!”

“Oh my gosh,” Romelle giggled “You’re one to talk, you’re the most stunning woman I’ve ever seen!”

“Yes, and your hair! How on earth is it so long and healthy?” Shay asked.

“Well,” she said leaning in “I follow the curly girl method, getting rid of sulfates and parabens in my hair products has made my hair so much healthier, especially since I dye it.”

“Wow,” Shay shook her head “I’ve heard of that, but I could never manage my curls, so I just keep it short and straight. Lance tried to help me in college because his hair is naturally curly too, but since he’s a guy and it’s so short it takes a bit less care. Eventually, I just gave up.” 

“Aw, well I can totally help you out with it if you’d like!”

“I’d love that!” Shay smiled.

“And Romelle can, of course, join us too, we can have a girl’s night!”

“Oh my gosh, that sounds so much fun!” Romelle squeaked

Giggling the three women exchanged hugs like they’d been friends for years and Keith shook his head “I don’t understand, how are they friends already.”

“Because they’re nice,” Allura shrugged turning to Keith.

“You make it sound so easy.”

Allura shook her head fondly “Well you can talk about how it’s hard to make friends, yet I know you made knew ones, Hunk says you’re especially close with Lance, which I’d assume is you?” She asked her eyes falling on Lance who Keith was still standing beside.

“Yeah, it’s really great to me you! This is my husband, Ethan.” Lance gestured to Ethan who had been completely silent since they’d arrived.

Ethan didn’t really fit in with Lance’s friends, well, that and he never seemed to care or try to get to know them. Honestly, Lance was surprised Ethan had even agreed to come tonight, but he appreciated that he’d made the effort.

Except as Lance introduced Ethan, his husband was engrossed in his phone typing something with his brows furrowed.

“Ethan,” Lance said quietly nudging him.

He looked up from his phone “Oh, yes hello, it’s good to meet you.”

“It’s nice to meet you too,” Allura smiled politely and they shook hands.

Lance recognized that Ethan was wearing his polite doctor's face and he shifted uncomfortably at the fakeness in his husband’s expression.

Allura’s eyes flashed down to Lance’s clenched fists and Keith’s dark eyes which were trained on Lance. Her brow furrowed seeming to take in something. Lance wasn’t sure what she was seeing but he swallowed nervously feeling was being X-rayed, as if she could see right through him.

“Well,” Allura started “I’m so glad that my friends were able to find a home here with all of you, I wish I’d got to meet all of you sooner, but you know, life gets in the way sometimes.” Allura shrugged her smile dimming slightly for a moment before returning at full force.

“It’s understandable, but I’m glad we get to meet you now.” Lance returned her smile brushing off the unease.

“We should eat now,” Hunk cut in “I made my famous chicken,”

This was followed by gasps and an unearthly shriek on Pidge’s part “Oh my fucking god! I love your chicken!” They said bolting out of the room and to the dining room “Let’s eat!”

Lance exchanged a look with Keith and they laughed following Pidge into the kitchen.

Halfway through dinner, Ethan who had been being polite and making small talk, answering questions about his work and things stood up suddenly as his phone began to ring.

Lance had been happy with how his husband had been acting so far, at least it felt like he was _trying_. But as he stood Lance reached for him.

“Ethan,” he pleaded, “could you please not take that tonight.”

“I have to, work stuff,” Ethan said.

“Can’t someone else do it for once?” Lance asked grabbing Ethan’s wrist.

“No,” Ethan said in a carefully polite voice, but Lance knew the undertone well, the way his eye twitched dangerously “They can’t. You know this.” Sensing the danger Lance quickly let go of Ethan averting his eyes. Ethan quickly left the room answering the phone.

“Hello, yes, this is Dr. Jacobs-Mclain…”

Across the table, Keith’s eyes found Lance’s _it’s okay_ Keith mouthed, and Lance nodded trying his best to relax. It wasn’t really okay, it never was, but Lance knew that wasn’t really what Keith meant, he meant that he was there if Lance needed him.

There was an awkward moment of silence before the conversation started back up again and the uncomfortable feeling in Lance’s chest eased slightly.

A few minutes later Ethan returned announcing that there was an emergency with a patient of his and that he had to go.

Lance knew better than to argue anymore, he’d already pushed it tonight, so he just nodded following his husband out of the room as he was heading for the door.

Ethan turned to Lance “Pick up the kids from their sleepover tomorrow and I need you to do the laundry, also the playroom needs to be cleaned up, when I walked past today it was a disaster.”

“Oh, but I had plans for tomorrow actually…” Lance said quietly

“That’s great, Lance so did I but now I have extra work so I think you can put your plans aside for once and carry some weight huh? I’m so tired of you being fucking useless”

Lance flinched “right, right. Yeah, I can do that.”

Ethan rolled his eyes “Good.”

Ethan left and Lance returned to the dining room, he was surprised to be met by complete silence as his friends looked at him with wide eyes.

“Lance,” Hunk said carefully “Do, you uh… always let Ethan treat you like that?”

Lance froze caught off guard for a moment his heart beating hard. “Um…” he gasped trying to get a grip as he moved back to his seat “You heard that?”

His friends nodded and Lance swallowed his hands shaking “Um, no. I mean he’s not usually like that, he’s just having a hard time, he lost a patient of his last week, and she was only a kid, so he took it pretty hard.”

“Oh,” Hunk frowned “I can imagine how that must be pretty hard, but it’s not okay for him to demean you just because he’s upset.”

“I know, I know.” Lance said quickly “I wouldn’t normally, let it go like that,” He laughed to cover the nervous tremor in his voice “but I figured it was easier to just let him off tonight since we’re guests and everything. I’ll talk to him about it tomorrow. He’ll probably call tonight to apologize too.” Lance shrugged acting like that was something his husband did, apologizing. “You know it’s just how life works sometimes, I’ve definitely treated people badly when I was having a hard time when I never would have normally.”

“Well, yeah, I have too.” Hunk admitted, “as long as everything’s alright with you guys.”

“Of course,” Lance chuckled easily “relationships aren’t always going to be sunshine and rainbows.”

“True, true.”

“Yeah,” Shiro chuckled “Once Curtis got upset and lit my hair on fire.”

“That was an accident!” Curtis screeched “you keep telling people that and they’re gonna think I’m a pyro!”

The table dissolved into laughter and the conversation turned to stories of times Curtis has lit things on fire while he protested. Everyone let go of the whole thing with Lance and Ethan, accepting his excuse once again.

Only two people remained unsmiling, Keith his eyes in his lap and his bottom lip between his teeth and Allura who’s gaze was stuck on Lance her brow furrowed.

Lance didn’t notice this though.

\--

It was two months later when they all were able to meet for dinner again, this time Lance came alone, Ethan was working as usual and the twins were with Veronica who was in town for the next two weeks, she and her girlfriend Axca were actually joining everyone for dinner on the next Friday but this week they wanted to have dinner with just the twins so Lance dropped them off by her and headed home to visit with his friends.

Dinner was already in full swing when he got there but Lance had expected that, he told them he’d be late. Everyone greeted him warmly and pushed Lance towards food. He ate and chatted as usual, but Lance’s heart just really wasn’t in it, not tonight. He felt like a stranger watching himself interact and smile without actually feeling connected to that person, even though _that person_ was him.

The past couple months had been really rough for Lance, Ethan had turned from his usual routine of mostly ignoring Lance and occasionally getting on his ass for not being good enough to constantly yelling at him to the point where Lance couldn’t even sleep anymore because every time he tried to close his eyes Ethan’s words would ring through his head and Lance was suddenly reminded of everything he hadn’t done. At this point, Lance could never predict what Ethan would get mad about next so after working all day, then taking care of the kids he’d spend the rest of his time doing household tasks, cleaning, taking care of bills, money, groceries, car maintenance and any other thing that needed to be done.

At first, his only solace had been Keith, sneaking to him and finding a tiny bit of peace in Keith’s arms and lips. They didn’t talk about it whatever Keith could tell was eating at Lance, Keith knew Lance well enough to know he wouldn’t want to. So instead Keith pressed loving kisses Lance’s face and whispered words of love and adoration like a prayer. That was enough to keep Lance going, waking up every morning even when he wanted to just go back to sleep and never wake up again. But he’d imagine Keith’s smile, that secret gentle little one that only Lance got to see, and that was enough.

Except as time passed and Ethan only seemed to get crueler Lance was faced with something he’d never felt in regards to his husband before, fear.

He had resented Ethan, been angry, sad, lonely, anxious because of him, but never afraid.

Now Lance was terrified, living every day in the shadows of fear, what would Ethan say next, what would he do? Would he do as he’d threatened, kick Lance out and keep the kids from him? Would Ethan hurt Lance this time, for real? Besides the occasional hand that was just a bit too tight on Lance’s arm, or the harsh push Ethan would give him when he wasn’t doing things fast enough. The times Ethan would grab Lance and hold him violently against the wall until while Lance cried begging him to let go. Those moments stayed stuck in Lance’s brain, being trapped, unable to breathe with Ethan’s arm pushing at his throat.

Lance had never been more afraid in his life.

As the fear started to consume Lance, he withdrew from Keith, stopped going over as much, stopped responding to his texts. Keith hadn’t said anything to Lance about it yet, but Lance could tell that it was upsetting him.

Lance couldn’t even bring himself to think about what Ethan might do if he found out that Lance was cheating on him. So, he kept his distance, put on a fake smile and acted like everything was fine.

“Lance?” There was a hand on Lance’s shoulder suddenly and he jerked out of his thoughts flinching away from the touch with a yelp before he could process what was happening.

“Woah,” Shiro said stepping back with his hands up “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“Please don’t touch me!” Lance said the terrified words escaping his mouth in his state of panic before he could stop them.

At this, the confused expressions of his friends froze Lance’s words sending a jolt through the room. Lance’s reaction, his words, the bags under his eyes. They were wrong, very wrong.

Allura stiffened across the room, “Lance,” she said carefully “what’s going on, are you okay?”

“Oh, yeah, yeah.” Lance said standing up straight “Sorry for freaking out there for a second,” He laughed and it sounded easy but in the silent room it came across flat “I watched Insidious on my own the other night and it terrified me, so I’m a little jumpy.” He shrugged.

Except this time is casual excuse didn’t seem to convince anyone like it usually would, Allura frowned and Shiro eyed Lance suspiciously.

Lance’s eyes found Keith’s pleading silently and Keith stepped up reading Lance instantly despite their recent distance.

“Oh yeah, that movie even scared me when I watched it, and I’m not really afraid of those things,” Keith said cutting through the silence.

Their friends still seemed unconvinced but at that moment Lance’s phone began to ring and he pulled it out.

“Oh, you know what, I need to take this,” Lance said standing up and quickly leaving heading for the front porch.

\--

Keith found him there a few minutes later, phone screen dark hanging limply in Lance’s hand.

“You needed to take that call?” Keith asked eyebrows raised.

“No,” Lance responded flatly.

Keith moved to stand beside him, and they were silent for a while before Keith eventually turned to Lance.

“Okay, I’m sorry I can’t just stay quiet anymore. What the hell is going on?”

“What do you mean?”

“You know what I mean.”

“It’s none of your business.”

“Lance!” Keith pleaded. “Why are you pushing me away?”

“Because this is wrong!”

Keith stepped back in surprise as Lance wheeled to face him, his eyes glassy “All of this is wrong.” Lance hissed and something in Keith’s chest crumbled.

Look he wasn’t an idiot, okay? Keith knew he was walking a tightrope from the moment he kissed Lance. He was married and Keith was socially awkward, he’d never fallen in love with anyone before Lance, Keith didn’t do romantic relationships. So actually, he had to take his previous statement back, he was an idiot because he’d fallen in love with a married man.

Because some stupid fucking part of him had believed that this was going somewhere, that Lance loved Keith just as much as Keith loved him. But in all the time they’d been seeing each other Lance had never once mentioned them having any sort of future, never spoke of leaving Ethan. Keith never asked him to. Maybe he should have, just so that Lance could refuse, and Keith could get over it all faster, before he was in too deep.

But the thing about falling in love with your best friend is that there’s nowhere to go but deeper. You already know their hopes, dreams, fears, so you push forward, learn every single inch of their soul.

Keith was a fool because he’d been into deep from the second Lance approached him on the front porch years earlier. And he just kept pushing.

Now here he was, and Keith had no one to blame but himself.

“I’m cheating on my husband Keith,” Lance said his voice shaking.

In all this time, it was actually the first time either of them had ever said it, their relationship was built around avoiding the topic.

“I’m a cheater,”

“I know,” Keith whispered.

“And this is all just an affair! All of this… it’s not love, Keith.”

Keith ignored the tears that escaped out of his blurry eyes falling down his face “I know,” Keith repeated his voice cracking and his throat closing up.

Lance paused for a moment taking a deep breath before saying quietly “ _We’re done_ …” He shook his head standing up straighter and saying it again, this time his voice stronger and firm, a decision had been made “We’re done.”

There was a second of silence between them, boiling like a hurricane before it all shattered to pieces and Lance took a step back, then another. Then he was turning away and crossing the street back to his house, Keith watched him go, Lance didn’t look back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: I have another short little fic called Oh, Simple Thing which was inspired by the same song that I titled this chapter after, it takes a very different approach than I'm taking here though lol.


	4. cause you can't love nothing unless there's something in it for you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: abuse, violence.
> 
> Chapter title from: You should be sad by Halsey.

**Part four: cause you can't love nothing unless there's something in it for you**

**(an ending)**

There was the slam of the front door and Keith entered the house, but Lance wasn’t with him.

“Where did Lance go, is he okay?” Shiro asked standing up concerned as Keith came back in the house.

“Lance is a fucking asshole,” Keith growled stalking off to his room.

A minute later he reappeared with a hastily packed backpack and his car keys.

“Keith,” Shiro looked very worried now “What’s going on? Where are you going?”

“I don’t know, anywhere but here.”

It was at this moment that Shiro noticed the redness of Keith’s face and realized that his little brother was crying. The thing with Keith was that he’d built himself walls so thick that almost nothing could get past them, he didn’t let things hurt him. Shiro hadn’t seen Keith cry since he was in Sixth grade.

“Keith,” Shiro said quietly reaching for his brother but Keith darted away from his reach.

“I have to go,” He mumbled, then hastily wiping his eyes he turned away.

The front door slammed shut behind Keith and a moment later Shiro could hear his car engine as he pulled away. Then he was gone.

Shiro turned to his friends, face white in shock “What the hell is going on?”

“It seems like Keith and Lance had a fight,” Adam said comfortingly touching his partner’s shoulder.

“I’ve never seen Keith like that.”

“Well, Lance means a lot to him, something is clearly going on that we’re not aware of. I’m sure they’ll work it out. You know how Keith is, spontaneously leaving sometimes, he just needs to cool off than I’m sure he’ll be back.” Curtis said taking Shiro’s other side.

“I hope so,” Shiro muttered.

\--

Keith came back five days later, Hunk called Shiro as soon as Keith walked in the house and Shiro was there not even fifteen minutes later.

“Where is he?” Shiro asked Hunk bursting through the door.

“He went to his room.” Hunk said frowning “Didn’t say a single word to Pidge and I. I tried to talk to him, but he still seemed really upset.”

“This is so unlike him,” Shiro said worriedly and made his way over to Keith’s room knocking on the door.

“Keith?” Shiro called softly.

The door remained shut but Shiro could hear Keith moving on the other side so he knew his brother must know he was there.

“Um, it’s okay if you don’t want to talk to me. I don’t know what’s going on, but whatever it is I really hate that you’re hurting.” Shiro sighed sadly “I’m here for you, you know you can tell me anything, but if you don’t want to that’s okay. Just know that I love you no matter what, okay? I love you kid.”

There was a moment of silence and just as Shiro was about to give up and leave his brother alone when the door opened. Standing in the doorway Keith was wearing old sweats, his hair was a disaster, and there were dark bags under his eyes. His face was pale, and he just looked so fucking devastated.

“Oh, Keith,” Shiro said softly.

“I’m sorry,” Keith whispered his voice raspy and jagged. “I’m so sorry. I’m so fucking stupid, god I’m an idiot. I don’t know what I was thinking!” Keith’s voice cracked and he started to cry.

“Hey, I’m here for you Keith,”

Keith threw himself into his brother’s arms, Shiro held him tight as Keith’s shoulders shook. A few seconds later Pidge and Hunk peered cautiously down the hall. At seeing Keith crying the rushed over joining Shiro and enveloping their friend in a group hug.

When eventually Keith stopped crying, he started to pull away and they let go. The stayed silent as Keith wiped his eyes taking a deep breath. It seemed to cleanse him a bit and he took another before standing up straight.

“I’m okay,” He said shakily.

“Really?” Pidge asked timidly, they looked uncharacteristically scared.

Keith hesitated before shaking his head “No,” He said, and he seemed so small “but I will be. I just need time.”

“What happened? I’ve never seen you like this.” Pidge said.

“I… I can’t- don’t want to talk about it. I-I made a mistake, I did some stupid things. All I can do is move forward now.”

“Okay…” Pidge said though they didn’t look like they really wanted to accept this explanation.

“We’re here for you Keith.” Hunk said reassuringly.

“I know, I know…” His voice dropped to a whisper “thank you.”

\--

Keith’s car was back. Lance had noticed it immediately as he pulled into the driveway after picking the twins up from school. They were arguing in the backseat about pineapple juice (Lance had no idea why) and he didn’t even stop them even as Jack yelled: “Papa she’s hitting me!”

Lance didn’t even register it; his eyes were fixed on Keith’s car finally back in the driveway. It had been five days since Lance had seen it and at this point, he’d started to wonder if Keith had left for good, but he’d been too afraid to ask Pidge or Hunk.

After Lance had taken off at dinner, he’d been texted multiple times by his friends asking if he was okay and what was going on. Lance responded to each text the same way:

**I’m fine! Something came up and I had to run, sorry for taking off. I’ll see you on Friday with Veronica and Acxa!!!** **😊**

Except nothing was fine, Lance hadn’t gotten more than a few hours of sleep since he’d left Keith on the porch. The image flashed through Lance’s head whenever he closed his eyes, the absolutely devastated look on Keith’s face, the tears the spilled down his face. The worst part was that he hadn’t even looked surprised. Like he’d always known this was coming.

But hadn’t it always been? There was no other way this could have ended. Lance was married, he had two kids, he couldn’t throw all of that away. Because he knew the truth, if Lance lost Ethan, he lost Elise and Jackson too.

Lance was suddenly brought back to earth by the screech of said children.

“Papa!” Elise screeched and Lance barely suppressed a groan, god he was so fucking tired.

“Guys,” Lane scolded though it was halfhearted “if you don’t stop fighting you can’t have a snack.”

They instantly shut up and Lance unlocked the car and they piled out leaving their lunch boxes and juice bottles in the car. As they headed towards the door Lance stopped them to give them the house key so they could get inside and went to the back of the car to collect their trash. Normally he would have made them clean up after themselves, but Lance really didn’t feel like arguing today.

As Lance started towards his house arms full, the front door opened across the street opened and Shiro stepped out followed by Keith. They stood on the porch talking for a moment before Shiro turned and catching sight of Lance he waved.

“Hey, Lance!” Shiro greeted calling across the street.

Keith froze at hearing Lance’s name, they made eye contact for a brief second before Lance quickly turned away hurrying inside without returning Shiro’s greeting.

Lance thought there must be something very wrong with him because he hadn’t felt half the guilt he was feeling now for cheating on his husband. But the fact that Lance had hurt Keith so badly ate away at him. He’d never felt so much guilt in his entire life.

\--

The dinner planned for that Friday was _never_ going to be normal. But you couldn’t blame Hunk for hoping it would be, it’s not like he knew what was going on.

Just having Lance and Keith in the same room after their breakup would have been a disaster, but funnily enough, the one thing both former lovers expected to make that dinner a rough night, was actually one of the least terrible parts of that night. Though, that’s not saying much, because this particular night would go down in history as the worst night of Lance’s life.

Which is saying a lot because Lance had been through some pretty fucking awful nights.

\--

Veronica and her girlfriend Acxa, who was also Keith and Shiro’s sister arrived at Hunk, Pidge, and Keith’s place with Jackson and Elise in tow, but Lance was nowhere to be seen. Honestly, a part of Keith was relieved, maybe Lance had decided not to come?

Veronica and Acxa exchanged hugs with everyone settling down in the living room where everyone always gathered to chat before eating.

“Where’s Lance?” Hunk asked as they sat down, and the twins began to entertain themselves with Veronica’s phone moving into the other room.

“Um,” Veronica frowned “he’s at home still, Ethan was home when we got back from going out with the twins a few minutes ago, he was supposed to be at work so something must have happened because as soon as we walked in Ethan told Lance they needed to talk so Lance sent us over here.”

“Oh wow, that sounds pretty serious.” Hunk’s eyebrows furrowed. “I hope everything’s okay.”

“I don’t know,” Veronica shrugged “Ethan seemed really pissed. Lance lost his phone and he’s been freaking out all day about it, he keeps talking about like having all his credit card info on there and what if someone found it and hacks their account.” She made a slightly bewildered face at that “I don’t know, I figured Lance was being crazy, but maybe he was right. I’ve never known him to be very anxious and paranoid like that, it was weird.”

“Excuse me,” Allura asked suddenly raising her eyebrows “what do you mean you’ve never known him to be anxious? Lance is a very nervous person.”

Veronica made a confused face “No… he’s not. Lance has never been nervous or anxious, he’s not a worrier. He was into theater all his life and was always up on stage, he did gymnastics, cheer, he’s always done all this crazy shit, performing, doing tricks, risky jumps, front handsprings, and he’s never been nervous about any of it. He’s not afraid to be around people or take risks, it’s what I’ve always thought makes him so special, his lack of fear.”

“That doesn’t really sound like the Lance we know.” Shiro said frowning “I mean, I guess he was closer to what you’re describing when we first moved in, but he’s gotten timider I guess.”

“In all the time I’ve known him, which I admit hasn’t been that long he’s been quite nervous, jumpy, anxious. Since nobody said anything about it, I just figured it was just the kind of person he is.”Allura said.

“No,” Veronica said forcefully “that’s not the kind of person he is at all.”

“Then,” Allura stood up suddenly looking upset, “I think we need to look at the fact that he’s changed and think about what that means.”

“What could it mean?” Pidge asked looking worried “that he’s developed anxiety as he aged or something?”

“I don’t think so. Look, I didn’t say anything because I thought that you all knew Lance well enough to tell if something was really wrong, I met him not so long ago, but as soon as I met him something felt wrong. I’ve been watching him, but it wasn’t until last week that I felt like I’d seen evidence that something was really wrong, I tried to reach out to him, but he answered my text with an excuse.”

“Allura, what are you talking about, where are you going with this?” Veronica asked.

“I work for an organization that specializes in mental health care for people who suffer from psychological and emotional trauma, there are many types of trauma but mostly we see victims of abuse or sexual assault at my clinic. You learn to recognize people who have been through trauma, there are certain side effects. I feel that Lance exhibits some of these in his behavior.” 

“But so say that you’re right and Lance has been through trauma or whatever, what kind of thing would that be?”

“Well it could be anything from a severe injury or a situation where he felt like his life was very close to ending, could be from witnessing a traumatic event, often we see many people suffering from trauma after terrible natural disasters, so many people were affected during nine-eleven, also people who have been assaulted or abused, in any way at all can suffer from trauma.” 

“But I don’t think any of those things happened to Lance, maybe you’re wrong.” Veronica frowned.

“Maybe,” Allura admitted “I’m not psychic, I can’t know for sure. But this is just what I’m picking up on. You could maybe try to talk to him when he comes over.”

“Okay, okay, I’ll try, but I’m sure he’s fine.”

“I hope so,” Allura said softly.

\--

Lance didn’t come over though, three hours passed, it was late, they’d finished eating ages ago and the twins were fast asleep, after passing out on the floor Acxa brought them to the guest bedroom to sleep.

“Maybe I should go over there,” Veronica said worriedly “I can’t contact Lance since he lost his phone and it’s just across the street. But if something’s going on, I really don’t want to interrupt Lance and Ethan while they’re dealing with it. I mean if their credit card info really was stolen or something that’s some serious shit.”

Except lucky for her Veronica didn’t have to interrupt them, the front door burst open suddenly and Ethan walked in.

“Hey is everything okay?” Veronica asked him.

“No,” Ethan said his voice dangerously low “nothing is okay, though I bet you thought it was okay didn’t you Kogane?” Ethan snarled turning suddenly to face Keith who’d spent most of the night silently hidden in his phone.

As soon as Ethan’s eyes fell on him Keith stiffened letting his phone fall to the floor as he stood. “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Keith said carefully, though he had a sickening feeling that he actually did.

“Oh, don’t play dumb with you fucking piece of shit! I know you’ve been fucking my husband!”

Shiro gasped at that, Ethan was crazy, right? Everyone expected Keith to shake his head in confusion and put Ethan right, of course, he hadn’t been sleeping with Lance. Lance was married. Except Keith didn’t shake his head.

After a moment of stiff silence, Keith squared his jaw, fists clenching ready for a fight. “Well someone had to do it.”

Surprisingly Ethan didn’t immediately try to mutilate Keith “He’s not yours.” Ethan hissed

Keith laughed bitterly “I know, I’ve never thought he was mine, Lance belongs to no one but himself. He most certainly doesn’t belong to your disgusting ass.”

“That’s where you’re wrong, Lance does belong to me, he does everything I tell him to, he always listens our life is perfect.”

“Your life is a lie, Lance doesn’t love you, Lance loves the idea of being normal, of fitting in. He used you for that and got stuck. Now here we are.”

“You have a lot of nerve,” Ethan spat “How long have you been fucking him, the little slut wouldn’t tell me. Couldn’t even force it out of him,”

“I swear to god if you hurt him, you’ll regret it for the rest of your life,” Keith said angrily.

“What like you could stop me?” Ethan stepped forward “Now tell me, how fucking long?”

Keith wasn’t sure how he kept his composure but somehow the words made it out of his mouth “A year. We were together for a year.”

This was the thing that really set Ethan off, he lunged forward probably to throw a punch but was cut off by a yell as Lance suddenly ran into the room. He looked like someone on their deathbed, his face was gaunt and pale, the bags under his eyes looked like they’d at some point been hidden by concealer that was now smeared and streaky, there was a large red bruise on his face that looked fresh and he was shaking.

“No!” He yelled taking in the scene in front of him “Please Ethan, don’t hurt him. It’s all my fault okay, I made the first move, I kept the relationship going even when Keith wanted to end things! It’s my fault, I must have lost my mind. But I realized last week that I was acting crazy and ended things with Keith! It’s over and it never meant anything anyway!”

Almost every single word that came out of Lance’s mouth was a lie.

Ethan seemed to recognize this, and he lunged again this time at Lance, grabbing him by the neck. Lance flinched as Ethan’s hand found his throat violently, but Lance didn’t fight as tears streamed down his face. He looked like a man who had long ago given up, who had accepted that he deserved this. But he didn’t.

Keith knew that, all their friends knew that, they had stood, Shiro was about ready to beat Ethan to a pulp but Keith got there first. He landed a hard punch to Ethan’s jaw, crying out in pain he released Lance and Keith took the opportunity. Sure he was a pilot, but learning basic self-defense was mandatory at the Garrison, that combined with the fact that Keith would get into a lot of fights when he was younger gave him an edge over Ethan, in a matter of minutes the man hit the floor and Keith held him there.

Lance crawled backward gasping, and as the chaos froze Allura stepped forward.

“I’ve called nine-one-one, she said shakily the police are coming so I’d advise you get the hell out and don’t lay another finger on Lance.”

Keith stepped back and that was all the encouragement Ethan needed, he quickly scrambled up and fled the house.

Silence followed his departure broken after a few shocked moments by Lance’s terrified whisper “Oh my god, oh my god.”

“Lance,” Keith said gently kneeling down in front of the man he loved.

“I’m so sorry,” Lance said tears falling down his cheeks “Keith I’m so sorry.”

“Why? You don’t have to be sorry, it’s okay.”

“I’m afraid,”

“That’s okay too.”

“I didn’t want to hurt you,” Lance said to Keith, “I thought I was doing what was best.”

Keith’s shoulders dropped sadly “I understand, I forgive you, Lance.”

Lance shook his head tearfully “You shouldn’t, I don’t deserve that.”

Keith leaned forward taking Lance’s bruised face gently in his hands “You deserve the world, Lance, you deserve to be so, so happy. We made some wrong decisions, but I don’t regret it.”

“Neither do I,” Lance whispered.

“Then there you have it.”

Lance chuckled weakly but his small laugh quickly turned to sobs, Keith reached for him hesitantly, when Lance didn’t move back Keith gently pulled him into his arms, holding him tight.

Outside blue and red lights flashed through the curtains as the police arrived.

\--

Things didn’t immediately get better after that. If this is a love story it’s a love story in it’s most fucked up form.

Ethan had been the one to have Lance’s phone, not trusting his husband he’d taken it and gone through it finding Keith and Lance’s text and the evidence of the relationship they’d had. Ethan had lost his mind when he found out, and well, you know how it happened.

Lance decided not to press charges against Ethan, instead, he fought for full custody of the twins, which he was able to get. Lance filed for divorce, quit his job, sold his house and decided to move himself and the kids back to Oklahoma where he’d grown up. Now everyone stood in front of Lance’s house as the moving truck departed and he loaded the last of his stuff into the back of the car. It was a scene parallel to the one that had started this all when Keith, Pidge, and Hunk moved in two years earlier.

“We’re gonna miss you so much Lance,” Hunk said tearfully hugging his friend.

“I’m going to miss you guys too,” Lance said sadly.

The last person to wish Lance goodbye was Keith, as the caught each other’s gaze Lance suddenly flashed back to a conversation they’d had not long after _everything_ had happened.

“You saved me,” Lance had said quietly. Keith had driven them out to the beach again, but they’d stayed silent most of the drive, the conversation the needed to have was one better had on the beach than in a car.

Lance stood beside Keith watching the waves ebb in and out, the sunlight painting him golden.

“I suppose so, I’m no hero or knight in shining armor, I was just so fucking angry that he was hurting you. So fucking angry I hadn’t realized how terrible he really was sooner.”

“This whole thing is so fucked up.” Lance laughed in a way that was slightly bitter but also like he found it amusing in some crazy way “I cheated on my husband with you, broke your heart, then you saved my life, it’s no love story.”

“Maybe not, but I love you.”

Keith said it so simply like it was just a fact. Everything was fucked up, it wasn’t like a storybook or a fairytale, but at the end of the day, they were in love. No matter how it had come to be, real love was just love.

“I love you too,”

There was a split second of hesitation before Lance’s hands were in Keith’s hair and their lips pressed together hungrily.

And it just felt so fucking _right_.

Like the pieces had fallen into place, as if the stars had aligned, things weren’t okay, but Lance was in love, so he knew eventually they would be.

Now in the present Keith wrapped his arms around Lance, rising on his toes to press a soft kiss to Lance’s face.

“Six months,” Keith whispered, “then I’m being transferred back to Texas and we’ll be close again.”

“Six months,” Lance nodded “I can handle that.”

“I know you can, you’re strong.”

Lance chuckled “I appreciate your faith in me.” He leaned down capturing Keith’s lips in an intense but sweet kiss.

Letting Keith feel all the things Lance wasn’t sure how to say. Keith seemed to understand because as they stepped apart Keith smiled softly and whispered it like a secret, like everyone didn’t already know at this point “I’m in love.”

“Me too,”

They shared one last smile before Lance turned away.

“You better call us to check in when you get a chance on the drive.” Shiro reminded.

“Of course, I will.”

“Good, have a safe trip.”

“Thanks, bye guys. Thank you so much for everything you’ve done for me.”

“No Lance, thank you.” Hunk said softly “It’s been an honor getting to be your friend, we’re going to miss you around here.”

“I’m going to miss you guys too.”

With one last round of hugs Lance got the twins hooked into their seats and ready for the drive, he turned around to wave at his friends one last time before getting in the car and pulling out of the driveway.

When Lance imagined this moment, he thought he wouldn’t look back as he left this street for the last time. But he couldn’t help glancing in the rearview mirror to watch it all disappear. His friends and Keith standing there waving as his car retreated and two houses across the street from each other in a normal suburban neighborhood. Two houses which Lance had cried in, laughed in, been hurt in, been scared in,

Fallen in love in.

Someone else would move into Lance’s old house, and in six months Hunk, Pidge and Keith would move out and go back home to Texas, then someone else would move into that house too.

Maybe the new neighbors would be friends, maybe some of them would fall in love, or maybe they’d stick to polite greetings every time they bumped into each other getting the mail and nothing more.

Lance’s history would be erased from these houses and their porches and yards, walls would be repainted, rooms remodeled, the garden changed, his plants dug up.

No one would know who had been there before, not really, though the neighbors would gossip while they watched their kids at the park on hot summer days, about the guy who used to live in that house and how they’d heard his husband was abusive.

“The police were there and everything.” Someone would say. But they wouldn’t really know.

Lance did though,

He knew that it all started with a Saturday, a warm spring day, and the house across the street.

_end._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We did it! I finished this and somehow it didn't take as long as I thought it would. This whole fic was definitely a disaster but it's my favorite mess I've ever made. It strayed a bit from my original idea but overall, I'm pretty happy with how it turned out.  
> Thanks for reading and please leave comments, (I'm not ashamed to admit I love them) tell me what you liked about this fic and if there are things you wish I'd done differently. 
> 
> If you're interested I've written a lot of other Klance fics, not all of them are as angsty as this one. You could go check those out!!
> 
> (edit: So I finished writing this a week ago and the amount of love it's getting and all the kudos really astounds me. I got into writing fics for the voltron after the show ended and the fandom was dying out so the amount of people who read my stories has been pretty small. I just recently hit 11,000 hits on all ten of my works combined, so my readers are a pretty small group but I appreciate you all, it warms my heart!! Sometimes it easy for me to feel like I'm writing and putting so much work into fics that nobody's reading and that can be discouraging for me. But I love y'all!!) 
> 
> <3 <3


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